witticisms by Jess Witty

November 20, 2009

It's about that time...

I feel it coming...

I finally finalized the design...

I ordered the cardstock, paper, and various other supplies...

I've made my list for twine, envelopes, and stamps...

my preparations for what we lovingly call The-Witty-Family-Christmas-Card-Sweatshop are under way.

This year it's actually The-Witty-Family-Christmas-Card-&-Baby-Announcement-Sweatshop, which (if you're keeping track) means that, yes... Noelle came in April and her announcements will just now be going out. And by "now" I mean "7 months since she came." No judgement, friends.


Does it make it better if I tell you that she is actually the second baby we've had born on the *exact* same day (and no... this is not a riddle... they're not twins and no... it was not planned that way) and the second time we've sent the announcements out in the Christmas cards?


Probably not, huh? It sorta seems like tradition at this point, so I'm rollin' with it.

This year's card features one of my very favorite papers from this year...

oh, how I love it. It's Basic Grey's Lemon Meringue Pie from their Nook & Pantry collection. It's so vintagey and homey... like a pattern I'd find while out junking... but the yellow feels is so fresh at the same time, too. I don't know what came over me with the yellow this year. Anyone else? I'm wearing yellow in our Christmas pic this year, too.

Moving on to today's projects...


a little card set I made for Emma's. The card bases are by 7gypises... I just folded them over and they made the perfect little 3 1/2" x 5" cards. Love that.














Just a little various embellishing on each one. They came together in a snap. Love that even more.



I used another one of my current faves to wrap them all up... the glassine bag. Can't get enough of those.

The directions and supplies for all the cards are up at Emma's, although I swear they are super simple!

Later, friends!

November 16, 2009

tweet tweet...

Hey, there, friends!

It's only a week and a half until Thanksgiving Day and what does that mean?

It means it's time for me to hunker down and actually decide on this year's Christmas card design.

Part A of this little plan has already been accomplished...
taking the annual Witty family Christmas picture... check.

The first time we've attempted it with 3 kids. Did I mention that all three kids are 5 years old and under? Yeaaaaaah. I like to to call it the quest for the fabled and often-sought-after-yet-never-quite-accomplished perfect family photo where all the subjects are at their optimum cuteness and actually looking at the camera while smiling.

Did I mention that all three kids are 5 years old and under?

So, really, we just settle for taking oh, about 252 pictures (more or less. Or exactly. Because that is exactly how many pictures we took. Seriously.) in speed time where the majority of the subjects are looking somewhat cute, all the while crossing our fingers that no one is crying.

Check.

I'm actually pretty much 100% happy with this year's edition. It features a super secret weapon that, I have to say, I came up with in a stroke of absolute genius. Without a doubt.

And now... I'm sure you'd like to actually see the pictures, huh?

Not yet, friends. Gotta save that for when my Christmas card is actually designed. Which... um... needs to be PDQ. (Did anyone else's mom say that when you were growing up... PDQ? Pretty darn quick. Mine did. ATT. All the time.)

So I'll just leave you with this little one today. Nothing to do with Christmas, but it makes me happy. The birdie is actually one side of those little favor boxes by Basic Grey... I thought it was a neat way to use it without actually making it into the favor box. I still love those little sentiments from PTI's Birds of a Feather set.




Christmas card design... here I come. Let's hope I'm inspired!

Later, friends!

November 13, 2009

13 days...

'til Turkey Day!

I love Thanksgiving.

Probably because I love turkey.
And stuffing.
Corn casserole.*
Green beans.
Deviled eggs.
Strawberry cranberry salad.
*make this at your own risk to your heart health. It is soooo good and people ask me for the recipe all the time, but it is not what I would call a "healthy" dish. In any sense of the word. But I've never met a person who didn't love it.

So much so that my MIL made me turkey, stuffing, and green beans the night I came home from the hospital with our second bambino.

I cleaned the plate. And then I asked for seconds. And when my husband asked me what I wanted more of, I told him to make the second plate exactly like the first.

And then I cleaned that one, too. Sick, I know. It either speaks to my deep and abiding love of turkey and all the accoutrements, or that I had not eaten solid food in several days. I prefer the former explanation.

We have a pretty casual Thanksgiving dinner... complete with all the usual suspects... Mom & Dad, brother and sister-in-law, etc... so we don't usually have place cards at our seats. (Does anyone else's family sit in the *exact* same seats *every* time?! I am just not sure what would happen if Dad didn't sit at my left at the table and Mom at my right with my brother across. Because that is just how we eat meals. All other family members have to fit in around the traditional Dad/brother/Mom/me formation because I can assure you, you do *NOT* break ranks in a tradition that workin' on past 30 years at this point. Are we the only ones?)

But, I'm not against the idea of place cards. In fact, I kinda liked how this one turned out. This little project comes to you from the November/December issue of Paper Crafts. The Photo Finish section is on how personalize your holiday table with photos... fun! For the holder, I can assure you, it was one of the easiest projects I have ever attempted. I just walked out the front door, picked up two sticks, and hot glued the ends together. Done.

I printed Brian's picture in a sepia tone to kind of go with the autumnal theme, then layered it up and stamped his name and sentiment (Simple Alphabet by Papertrey Ink). I trimmed the little acorn and leaf accents from some patterned paper (all papers are from the Mr. Campy collection by Cosmo Cricket) and added those just for a little fun. Then I slipped the whole thing in between the sticks and voila. It stands up by itself and everything. Pretty nifty, if I do say so myself.



If you're in the mood for a freebie, you can pop on by the Paper Crafts Connection blog for Freebie Friday. Kelly has linked up 6 projects from the Go-to-Gals (my project is from Wednesday's post below) and is offering up a sweet prize package from Karen Foster (it's a calendar kit which you could whip up and give as a sweet Christmas gift, therefore crossing one person off your list!).

Later, friends!

November 11, 2009

Fall is in the Air...

that's right, folks... it's all the way into the 60's today!
That's all right. Still feels like fall to me.

Today I'm bringing you one of my favorites that I've made in a little while. I love it when you picture a concept in your head and then it actually comes out looking just like you imagined and... bonus... you feel like it's good. This little perfect storm does not always happen for me!




There are two papers from Basic Grey's Indian Summer line which I love because it's has such a warm autumn feel and also a bit of funkiness with the addition of the purple hues. Love it.

I just trimmed some squares and then lined them all up on a piece of cardstock backing. Don't know why, but I'm totally into the patchwork look as of late. I intentionally picked the vibrant, yet a bit darker, papers so that the white rub-ons would really pop visually. Added a few rhinestones just for some shine.


I decided to switch it up and instead of stitching all the way around the focal panel I added the twine at the bottom and just stitched right over it at the sides. Kind of fun!

Later, friends!



{Fall is in the Air} card

Kraft Cardstock by Papertrey Ink
Indian Summer Autumn Glaze Paper by Basic Grey
Indian Summer Russet Paper by Basic Grey
Sweet Shoppe Sugar On Top Pattern Paper by Collage Press
Harvest Moon White Designer Rub-ons by Basic Grey
Bronze Rhinestone Embellishments by Kaisercraft
Orange Rhinestone Embellishments by Kaisercraft
Button Twine by Papertrey Ink

November 09, 2009

Since we last spoke...

we did a little bit of this...





and made a little bit of that.



And that's just the beginning.

In the midst of our home ringing with the lovely sounds of hacking coughs coming from 3 out of the 4 of us {#5 now has a lovely cold to go along with the rest of us sickies and I'm on week #3 of my cough... nice}, we had a *super* fun Halloween weekend.

We're actually really not big into Halloween. However, we didn't do Halloween so much as just spent the entire weekend together doing fun family things. We carved pumpkins just for the heck of it, and made the classic Little Smokie/biscuit "mummies", and even tried our hands at homemade caramel apples. Country Living made me do it. (Be sure to read the recipe below... the caramel temp is incorrect in the recipe through the link!)

Can I just say... homemade caramel... yeah, it is like the most underated candy item of all time. Cause it is good, people. Goooooood.

And if you have extra caramel, for the love of all that is sweet and sugary, whatever you do... do NOT throw it out. Do you hear me?

I made a half recipe to cover 6 apples and still had some extra caramel just staring lovingly up at me from the saucepan. It should come as no surprise to you that my first thought was, "Huh, I bet that would taste good on some homemade popcorn," but seeing as how the caramel was already cooling and there was no fresh popped popcorn just sitting around right at that moment, I went with the much-quicker-yet-slightly-brilliant-and-still-extremely-yummy plan of just dumping the caramel out onto wax paper in little piles and letting them cool. After that I just wrapped them up in some little rectangles of butcher paper and gave them a home in a mason jar. I have visited them often.



But I digress.

After we dipped the apples and let them cool a bit, I took the apples and the kids out and tortured them with had a little photo shoot. And can I just say, apparently caramel apples are just the thing you need when you want cute kiddie pics. Little miss didn't even get to eat one and she seemed to enjoy herself, anyway.




I actually made little brother hold the apple first without eating it. And he did. Seriously.



For a few seconds, anyway.



And then it was big brother's turn. And he cooperated, too. I'm sorry, but 3 kids, 3 cute pictures, all in one day... whoa. It was like the perfect storm of all picture taking attempts.


That pretty much made my weekend. And that was all before the trick-or-treating.

And to top it all off, who knew that 2 chefs (big and little brother) and their lobster-in-a-lobster-pot (little sister) would get you all the way to the grand prize at the costume contest?! Dude... I think that made big brother's *year.*

I didn't get any super cute pics of the kids in their costumes this year, but I did want to show you what I did with one of last year's pics. It just seems like such a shame that they get all dressed up and too darned cute but then you (and they) only get to enjoy it for a short time. I loved little brother's costume last year so I made a fall frame for it so we could enjoy it until the Christmas decorations went up. I just pulled it out this year and I'm so glad I have it! (The 2 little chefs also had hand-drawn curly mustaches this year, too!)







I frame our family Christmas picture each year and set them all out each Christmas... our living room is sort of a retrospective of Christmas' past during the holidays. I love seeing how everyone has changed over the years. I'm contemplating doing that with the Halloween pics, too. Hmmm... might have to whip something up for this year now.

Do any of you do anything special with your Halloween pics?

And, as a sidenote... I'm already planning next year's costumes! Yeah... I know... crazy. But still. This time, we're all going to get dressed up. I think the kids will love it if we all get in on it. So... I'm already on the search. And what, exactly, am I on the search for? Why, let me tell you.

One large black jacket and black wig.
One blue nightgown.
One green fairy dress.
Have you figured it out yet?)
And one green tunic with matching green leggings and green felt hat.

That's right, kids. We've all agreed on... Peter Pan!

Yes, even my husband. He's a team player. Come on, he gets to be Captain Hook... that is totally cool in an evil-bad-guy sort of way. Definitely thinking his costume will be the hardest. I did already score a deeply discounted pirate hook and patch. We also already have an alligator costume for little brother which was the costume that got this whole idea going. I did *not* score the size 18 month Tinkerbell costume I was hoping for, nor the with with the big black curly hair, nor the perfect pirate-y jacket.

So, if you have one to lend or send, or have a lead on where I can gather some of this stuff up now for cheap, let me know! I'm thinking I can make the Peter Pan costume pretty easily and super inexpensively, so I'm not so worried about that one. I figure if I start collecting things now, putting this little scheme together will be pretty fun and easy. (Feel free to remind me I said that next October when I start freaking out about it!)

Later, friends!


Caramel Apples

12 crisp apples
1 1/3 cup(s) dark corn syrup
1 1/3 cup(s) granulated sugar
1 1/3 cup(s) light brown sugar
1 1/3 cup(s) heavy cream
1/4 teaspoon(s) salt
3 tablespoon(s) butter
3/4 teaspoon(s) vanilla extract

Line a baking pan with a generously oiled sheet of parchment paper. Push a candy apple stick into the core of each apple.

Combine the syrup, sugars, heavy cream, and salt in a large saucepan over medium-high heat. Simmer until the mixture reaches 234 degrees F – about 15 minutes.

Remove from heat, stir in the butter and vanilla. Let cool for 6 to 8 minutes, until caramel thickens to a toffeelike consistency.

Dip and gently swirl the apples into the caramel and place on the prepared baking sheet. Let cool completely.

October 28, 2009

10 minute challenge


This is what happens when I only have 10 minutes to make a card.

Here's the story. We have a new baby niece - yay! (Obviously, her name is Bryn.)

I (being the most wonderful auntie that I am) went shopping for Baby Bryn and got her a few way cute outfits that I might possibly have bought 2 of so that when Bryn and Noelle are together at Christmas they will match. (It's sick, I know.) I got the way cute outfits together and went to make a tag so that I could send the said way cute outfits off with my hubby to Grandma's house (she was delivering them to Baby Bryn because Bryn lives far, far, way too far away). But then I was seized with this moment of "Seriously? Do you seriously think you can send these way cute outfits off without a way cute card?!"

Obviously, the answer was NO.
So, this is what happens when I only have 10 minutes to make a card.

Yeah... I'd like to change a few things. Such as adding some ink to the edges of the letters to make them stand out a bit more instead of stitching them. And making the card a bit longer so the letters weren't so smushed.

But, this is what happens when I only have 10 minutes to make a card.
And, I'm pretty alright with this one.

Anyone else have any 10 minute cards to share? I'm thinking about making it a regular thing here. I tend to spend an inordinate, blasphemous amount of time per card and I thought a regular 10 minute challenge might help me try to break that nasty little habit (or at least lessen it). Anyone feel my pain?

Later, friends!


{bryn} card
Cardstock: Dark Chocolate (PTI)
Stamps: Damask Designs (PTI)
Ink: Chocolate Chip (SU)
Letters: Making Memories
Ribbon: Raspberry Fizz (PTI)

October 26, 2009

It's Goul-ishous...

Last week I had a life-changing experience.

In the form of popcorn.

I know... popcorn. But I'm tellin' you... it was THE best homemade popcorn that I have ever tasted, crunched on, indulged in, devoured, etc. Now, I say it was the best homemade popcorn ever because there would be two obvious exceptions if I were to say it was simply the best all-encompassing popcorn ever.

1. Fresh Disneyland kettle corn, available only at Disneyland. Trust me on this one. No matter how many candy stores, gift shops, street vendors, etc. that you run hopefully up to or into at Disneyworld, you will not find fresh kettle corn. It does not live at Disneyworld. That goes for Epcot and Hollywood Studios, too. I'm like a stinkin' kettle corn expert after the last CHA trip.

2. The chocolate covered popcorn that the Boy Scouts start hawking door-to-door this time of year. And yes, they are selling it this year. I know this because I already gave into the Boy-Scout-who-used-to-be-shorter-than-me-but-who-now-should-be-called-Man-Scout because he has grown into a giant in the years that I have been buying overpriced chocolate covered popcorn from him. Therefore, there is already a tin of it on it's sweet little way to me.

Anyhow, so back to the best ever homemade popcorn.

When I was a kid we used to have homemade popcorn on movie nights. We had this kind of electric skillet looking thingamajigger that had a very large lid. You put the oil and corn in the skillet-y thing, then put the lid on and watched all the magic happen. Then you turned the ingenious thing over and the lid became the bowl.

Apparently, you can do the exact same thing in a pot on the stove. Seriously.

I know, I know. You probably already know this. But this was like headline news to me. Some friends of ours made it for us and plopped a big ol' bowl in front of me while we were playing a semi-dorky board game called Settlers of Cattan. Let me tell you, this popcorn was so good that I layed a serious Settlers smack-down on everyone else and won in about no time flat. It was that good.

So, the recipe goes something like this.
1. Put a large pan on stove and cover the bottom with oil. Add a bit more than that.
2. Throw in a few corn kernel, put the lid on, and turn the heat to high.
3. Wait until the kernels pop, then throw in more corn and put the lid back on. (We use 1/2 cup or a bit less for 2 of us.) Turn the heat to just over medium.
4. Wait for the magic to happen.
5. Shake the pot back and forth a bit while everything's popping to prevent the popcorn at the bottom from burning.
6. Add salt.

And, for the love of all popcorn, do NOT use the Great Value brand from Wal-Mart. We literally did a side-by-side comparrison of Great Value and the bulk corn from Sprouts and oh. my. goodness... I cannot express to you the difference. I take no responsibility for your lackluster popped yuckiness if you use the Great Value brand.

And what should you do with all those yummy kernels from heaven?

Why, papercraft with them, of course.

Perhaps whip up a few little ghosties for the kids at school?



Um, yeah. This project is super simple. Beyond simple. Embarrassingly easy, really.




I started with a few glassine and frosted bags.



I used a few scraps of newsprint patterned paper and punched some circles out in various sizes. I trimmed some of the circles into some other random shapes, just for the heck of it, and stuck them all onto the bags.



I loaded the bags up with popcorn and stitched the two larger bag shuts with the sewing machine. I added the stamped goulishous tag to the medium bag because, really, how could I not? I mean, come on... it says goulishous.



And, yeah... that's pretty much it. My kiddos enjoyed ripping the tops of the ghosties off to get to the popcorn. I guess ripping something's head off is a bit ghoulish.

I'm still trying to finalize costume plans for this week. The boys were both going to be chefs, complete with white jackets, chef hats, aprons, mustaches drawn on with eyeliner, etc. and litle miss was going to be a lobster hanging out in a lobster pot.

However, I'm entertaining the idea of making Zeke a little Nemo costume instead. I know it's a longshot, but any one out there ever attempted a Nemo costume? I want to know all the details!

Later, friends!


{Goulishous} Treat Bags

Alpha Series J Clear Mini Stamps by Basic Grey
Spook Alley Bat Newsprint Pattern Paper by Making Memories

Gusseted Glassine Favor Bags (small)
Gusseted Glassine Favor Bags (large)
Mini Frosted Plastic Gift Favor Bags
Black Soot Distress Ink by Ranger